Mile High Football League

 # Do not force your children to participate in sports, but support their desire to play their chosen sport. Children are involved in organized for their enjoyment. Make it fun.
# Encourage your child to play by the rules. Remember, children learn best by example, so applaud the good plays of both teams.
# Do not embarrass your children by yelling at players,coaches, or officials. By showing a positive attitude toward the game and all of it's participants, your child will benefit.
# Emphasize skill development and practice and how they benefit your young athelete.
# Know and study the rules of the game, and support the officials on off the field. This approach will help in the development and support of the game. Any criticism of the officials only hurts the game.
# Applaud a good effort in victory and in defeat and empasize the positive points of the game. Never yell or physically abuse your child after a game- it is destuctive. Work toward removing the physical and verbal abuse in youth sports.
# Recognize the importance of volunteer coaches. they are very important to the development of your child and the sport. Communicate with them and support them.
# If you enjoy the game, learn all you can about the game, and volunteer!

COMMUNICATING WITH YOUR CHILD'S COACH
TALKING TO COACHES

The amount of playing time a child receives is often the number one source of tension and conflict between volunteer coaches and parents.

How you -- THE PARENT -- handle the situation will have a significant impact on your level of enjoyment throughout the season, as well as your child's. 

The following are some tips to keep in mind before speaking with your child's coach:

Timing is everything - Don't confront the coach unexpectedly in the parking lot after a game. These kind of surprise attacks aren't fair to the coach and generally don't go smoothly anyway. Call the coach ahead of time and arrange to speak with him or her before or after an upcoming practice. Ask what would be the most convenient time to get together and go from there.

Be prepared to listen - If you're not willing to listen to what the coach has to say, then how can you realistically expect the coach to listen to you? If you focus on putting more effort into listening to what the coach is saying rather than trying to get your point across, the coach is going to be a lot more likely to work with you rather than against you.

Don't unload - Parents are often guilty of bombarding coaches with accusations, complaints and other negative comments. No matter how frustrated or upset you are, resist the urge to unload on the coach because it will accomplish absolutely nothing.

Civility Rules - You can quickly defuse what oftentimes is a tense situation between coaches and parents when it comes to the issue of playing time by being calm and friendly. Setting a civil tone right from the start is a critical building block for a productive discussion.

Solutions - Accept the fact that there are many ways to solve a problem. Come up with as many options as you can that combine the coach's interests and your own.

Be realistic - Don't approach the meeting with the belief that your child is being deprived of an athletic scholarship or a pro career because they aren't getting to play a certain position. Face the fact that your son is not going to be the next Michael Vick. If you take the attitude that your son is destined for stardom it will only cripple the discussion. Football not only builds character, but it reveals it too.

Know what you're talking about - If you signed your child up for a league that doesn't have a stated policy on playing time, and the coach believes your child isn't as talented as a lot of the other kids, then you're fighting an uphill battle on this one. Always make sure at registration that equal playing time is a clearly stated goal of the program before you and your child get stuck in a program that is going to be demoralizing for the both of you.

What would you do? - Prior to setting up a meeting with the coach, put yourself in his or her shoes. Carefully observe practice sessions and games and ask yourself if you could do a better job delegating playing time. If not, then you may be overreacting. If so, you've probably got a pretty good case and should explain your observations and suggestions to the coach.

Say Thank You - Thank the coach for taking the time to speak with you regarding your child. Coaches are typically parents themselves with their own son or daughter on the team. They understand that you want the best for your child, just as they do for theirs. Acknowledge their positive attributes, since many coaches only hear from parents when they're doing something wrong.

Regardless of the situation, using the techniques described above will improve your chances of having a productive discussion with your child's coach. It's certainly common for differences of opinion to arise from time to time during any youth sports season, but how YOU go about resolving them in a manner that is beneficial for everyone involved is critical

1. Don't try to live your life through your child. You had your chance to be young. Let your youngster do his/her thing. Don't force football or any sport down his/her throat. 

2. Don't be negative with your child. It rubs off. If you complain about why your child isn't in the starting lineup, he/she will do the same. BE POSITIVE, motivate and encourage your child. 

3. Don't be unrealistic. The good Lord gave all of us certain abilities. Accept your child as they are. We would all like to be big, tall, handsome, intelligent, and strong, but it doesn't happen that way. Accept what the Lord blessed you with and go on with your life. Make the best of it.   It's the same in football---someone may be bigger, faster, tougher, or smaller. Know your child’s limitations and encourage them to make the best of it. Accept their role on the team. 

4. Don't know the coaching staff. How can you expect your child to perform to his fullest if all he/she hears from you about the coach is negative? The coach represents authority. You will give your youngster the wrong message if you ridicule the coach or his teachers. Support the coach's rules, philosophies, playbook and so on. 

5. Don't be a know-it-all. Coaches work with youngsters 12 months of the year, through all sports seasons. They spend many hours with these youngsters in situations that their parents may never see. In some cases, coaches know more about the player then the parents do. Don't exert pressure on your child by telling him/her things he/she shouldn't have to hear. Be a good role model. Let the coach’s coach. 

6. Don't baby your child. Sever the umbilical cord. It's a tough world out there. Let him/her begin preparing for it by not babying him/her. Let the coaches push your child. Let the coaches make him/her tougher mentally by challenging them. A youngster can learn mental toughness regardless of whether he/she plays. 

7. Don't be selfish. Don't use football for the wrong reasons. Don't push your child to play for a scholarship. Doing so pressures them unduly. If he/she is good enough, he/she will earn a scholarship. Let them play because they love the game.